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March 24th, 2009
01:23 am
( Private to Krysanthe )
How about that game last night, eh?
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March 2nd, 2009
07:44 pm
Dear Santa,
I know that I am a little late in writing my letter to you this year, but I have been very busy since New Years. I am sure that you have heard of the marriage law, since you are an all-knowing being, and well...I wanted to assure you that I will continue being on my best behavior. I know several of my peers have been placed on the naughty list already due to their actions, but the same fate will not befall me!
I am sure that you also know about my new fiance and how I, of all people, am expected to marry the girl. I don't know the first thing about marriage, so I decided that this year for Christmas, I am going to forgo material objects and ask for a few simple marriage related things.
I would like my future wife to:
1) Not fuck with my stuff.
2) Know how to cook.
3) Be well endowed (not just with her bank account).
4) Be infertile.
5) Not fuck with my stuff.
Thank you,
Liam Adrian Bardou
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January 26th, 2009
09:12 pm
Your name is ELEANORE EGERTON.
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January 25th, 2009
12:55 pm
( Private )
There once was a fellow McSweeny
Who spilled some gin on his weenie
Just to be couth
He added vermouth
Then slipped his girlfriend a martini
Aspen, Colorado is stunning during this time of the year. There's been a recent string of arsonists destroying homes of the Rich&Famous so while you were all wearing long sleeves and coats, I was sitting next to Zahara Pitt-Jolie's burning house, warm as can be.
The only real downside is that I missed my lovely sister's wedding. At the time of Eleanore's call to tell me her wonderful news, I was boarding my flight. I didn't get the message until twenty minutes ago when I checked my helper.
Miles, congratulations. You're marrying a good (if difficult and sometimes scary) woman. Ellie, I can't believe I wasn't there to witness your marriage. I bought a box of tissues just for the occasion. You know I always cry at weddings.
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January 15th, 2009
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InsaneJournal |